Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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