Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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