watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize