i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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