she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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