I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize
