You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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