the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
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