Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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