Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
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