just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize
