I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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