i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
and you fell through a lawn chair
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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