OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize