I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Randomize