Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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