Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize
