I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Randomize
