CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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