i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
