is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize