yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Randomize
