Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Randomize
