I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
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hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
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My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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