I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize