lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Randomize