he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Randomize
