I skipped work to stalk him.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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