No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
How does one acquire holy water?
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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