A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
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