i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Randomize
