How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize