soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
