This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize