its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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