David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Randomize