An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
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I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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