So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize