sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize