Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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