If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize