I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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