My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
false alarm. still invincible.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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