I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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