Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
