Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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