You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
