I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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