singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Randomize
