So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
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